Just when I thought I saw all the craziest shit life can put on display, I stumble on Panda Fuck. Not that didn’t know this even existed, it’s just I forgot that this ridiculous site still lives! I didn’t see the picture before I entered the PornCodex segment for reviews, and I was bewildered what the title stands for until I realized when the homepage popped out. All I spotted is a repetitive black and white color that’s connected with a stick to a naked girl.
Literally. Love the rhythmic color covering, but it’s extremely odd to see a giant Panda, supposed to be a guy in a Panda costume, fucking a girl like it’s a normal thing to do, just humans in their natural habitat trying to reproduce with a hybrid creature. The deeper I go into this internet, the less I acknowledge where I even came from in the first place!
The site’s looking sharp uses the WTF’s genius platform only a heap of porn sites developed, so as far as I’m questioned, they can use it for an eternity because it’s proven best. You’ve got a bunch of videos displayed to you immediately, instead of senselessly switching between video pages like a baboon clicking on a mouse.
Another thing, I’m not quite sure of what material is the Panda’s dick made off, but all I know is that the dick is enormous and I really accent ENORMOUS, talking about 25-30cm in size, if not more! Maybe the virtual measurements can be deceiving, but the info I’m receiving from my eyes is perceiving 30! Panda’s are so caring that they even strapped an XL condom on that shift because of safety reasons!
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They could’ve at least think about a pun because Panda Fuck is explicit as Fuck (in their name)
Thank heavens, but the good of this world is withheld in a sacred place, and in the right hands. This site only has 32 videos, and like I said a long time ago in my scripts, when a site is utterly, no, UTMOST unique and just as much creepy and odd, it’s better for it to have a smaller number of videos so that it keeps its integrity and pride of being alone in the game.
Of course there are a follow-up 32 sets along the videos, and guess how many models are included in this show? 32! Looks like Pandas don’t have the power to share their cock to multiple gaping holes, even though their long log can be used as a cold weaponry.
This is kinda cute because we could imagine that it’s 32 different Panda’s fucking their respective girlfriends, getting laid with humans and fucking them hardcore like they’re filming a porno (which they obviously are).
Not sure how the girls managed not to crack or at least chuckle when they see a giant Panda’s head beneath them moving back and forth as a swing motion. There must’ve been cut-outs where they had to pause recording because a girl was dying of laughter!
Well, it’s better to die of laughter than to die of Panda AIDS, right? Is this word even allowed in porn-related articles? I don’t know but I did it for the pun’s sake, so all is forgiven to this player right here! Besides, if a Panda can fuck girls live streamed across a unique porn site consisting of only that, then I’m allowed to say anything I want as a trifle!
Pros and Cons of Panda Fuck
Pros:
- I’m speechless after what I just saw, luckily there are only 32 videos to see so that you don’t rethink of your life choices why are you watching a Panda fucking girls on your computer in 1 AM
Cons:
- Mark my words, but I’ll highlight this site as the GOAT, this isn’t a con but I hope you read between the lines to see how ridiculous this is
Conclusion
It’s quite unthankful to put this site in a conclusion stadium, so I’ll skip this part and let the deeds speak for themselves, just click on the button below to visit the site and you’ll be sure that any extra word from me is an overage.